Gball Online Magazine: For the Love of the Game

Life is about experiences--you live some, you learn some. However, as it was whizzing by, never for a moment, did I stop to think just how much the past week would teach me--both about basketball and having an athletic spirit.

Chapter One: "Go-to-Girl" No Longer?
(Tournament in Lebanon 1/31/01 -- 2/4/01)

Last week, both the girls' and guys' teams from my school earned second place in the basketball tournament we attended in Lebanon. Awards were given to several players on our teams for sportsmanship and general athletic performance. Our center earned the MVP award, and our point guard was given a spot on the all-star player starting five. I, on the other hand, received no award, no acknowledgement.

This, of course, was very disappointing for a committed player who was playing on an injured foot. But I shrugged it off and reminded myself that it was a team-effort that had earned us second place, and not individual effort. Nevertheless, for the two days following our tournament in Lebanon, I couldn't stop thinking about how my role on the team had somehow been altered.

Ever since the ninth grade, I've been a starter for the Varsity basketball team at the Amman Baccalaureate School, and in a sense, whenever it looks like we're losing a game, I've been the "go-to-girl". During time-outs, both my teammates and my coach would tell me to step it up and start taking the shots. I was more or less relied on to take the winning shot.

However, there are now players that have adjusted their own roles, and have become more dominant on the court. This, I am genuinely happy for, as two or three dominant players are better than one dominant player. Right?

Yesterday our team played the first game in the Ittihad tournament, here in Jordan. Tired from the Lebanon tourney, and eager to get the game over with, we played against the number one club team in Jordan, "Jazeera," and lost, badly.

I was benched for almost the entire game, confused and frustrated at my coach's actions. I usually play all but two minutes of all games, and being benched made me feel almost sorry for myself. Needless to say, the newly born self-sympathy led to an argument with my coach.

I argued that I shouldn't have been benched, and that I should have been allowed to at least play an entire quarter. I also complained that being benched was de-motivating and disheartening.

Today I awoke feeling silly and obnoxious at what I had previously said to my coach. After-school hours found me in her office, apologizing for my childish behavior. But there was still more to come ...

Today I marched onto the court with a rekindled determination, confident that we would be able to beat the "Ahli" club team. Smiling inside, I hit my first two outside shots, bringing us back from the 6 point deficit we had begun with.

The game progressed, and halftime came with us up by four. Our team was excited, and motivated. We knew we had the ability to win, and we knew that if we played the way we had the first half, the game was ours.

A minute on the clock left for the final quarter. Down by 13 points. I had two free throws to take. Both were in. Fast-break. Lay-up. In. Now down by nine, game ends, 64-73. 22 points next to my number. Am I happy? No. The 22 points didn't win the game.

During the team huddle, I was accused of not passing the ball enough. I was also accused of only caring about the number of points next to my name. I am hurt. I know that the disappointment at losing the game clouded everyone's minds, but still that's no excuse.

One measly game can disrupt an entire team's spirit. The only reason I like to play big, and score big, is to WIN big. But nevertheless, the tension between the team has increased, and I honestly don't know how it's going to be on Friday, our next contest.

The title doesn't lie. Today was extremely exasperating for us as a team. The refs just weren't making the right calls, and our shots just weren't falling. We lost against a team we've beaten a zillion times. Coach taught us a good lesson in sportsmanship by not confronting the refs, but we didn't follow suit. As players, we simply gave up.

During the last quarter, we were down by 13 points, and our team huddle had sparked a little hope amongst us. But hope wasn't enough to win the game. Neither was the full-court press that was our desperate attempt at regaining the lead.

We've had a losing streak for the past week, and we just can't shake it. Players are suggesting we drop out of the tournament, but I disagree. That'll only make it seem like we're sore losers that lack sportsmanship of any kind. I called each and every player tonight, and I sat for hours convincing them why we should stay in the tournament. Luckily, the majority agree with the idea of staying.

I never knew basketball could be so complicated. But, then again, before this past week, I didn't know a lot of things. I didn't know how difficult it is to maintain a good relationship with your teammates after a bad game. I didn't know that not being the lead scorer doesn't mean not being a good player.

I also didn't know just how much effort it takes to cling on to the image of victory. Losing faith and giving up is easy. But, it has become apparent to me, that only the strong survive. You have to grit your teeth, and take it. Because that'll only make you a stronger person.

The glue that holds a team together should be impenetrable, and the bonds that lie between players should be unbreakable. A lot has happened this past week, and I'm tired physically and emotionally. But I know that my teammates and I will pull through this. Most of all, I know that everything we experience will only make us all the more closer.

Aseel Barghuthi is in her senior year at Amman Baccalaureate School, in the country of Jordan, where she plays both point guard and shooting guard on the school team. She has also lived in the United States (Athens, Georgia) and England. To contact Aseel with any comments or suggestions, e-mail her at aseel@index.com.jo

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